May 30, 2020

You have power. Please use it.

heavy clouds blocking sunlight | Just Another Mary

When I worked for a PBS station, I learned children up to the age of four believe whatever they are seeing on TV is actually taking place. If they are exposed to violence, they believe it is occurring in that moment, not taped weeks earlier. This was fascinating to me, because I never outgrew this sensitivity. I can’t watch suspenseful or violent shows; I am not desensitized to what I am seeing.

It always surprises me to hear of people watching CSI shows and then somehow falling asleep. Today, I am no longer surprised. It is very evident we as Americans have a stomach for murder – we can watch it, rewatch it on multiple outlets, discuss it maybe and then talk about where we want to have brunch tomorrow or what designer shoes we are coveting.

It is so ridiculously comfortable to be white. We can see, hear, empathize and cluck our tongue at police brutality for our black brothers and sisters, but those church pews will always  keep us comfortable as we listen to the white priest or minister preach to the all-white congregation and then see him having lunch with a congregant at the all-white country club. Thank you white churches; you provide us a place to hide our heads when those “thugs” as our President likes to refer to them as, take up so much of the airways.

Oh, but what can I do Mary beyond “like” your post, because you know, “I’m not a racist”? Thank you, Jesus, that I have been asked this question, because I have stuff—I have stuff you can do, from the simplest to the more daring.

USE YOUR POWER. It is an abuse of power to not use your power, and if you are white you have power and agency in our society. Please use your powers for good. “But how?” you ask. See examples below, and feel free to think of more and please send them to me.

Never, ever, ever listen to anyone referring to someone as “some black guy” or “a black woman,” unless you say these words, “Why did you mention their skin color? What did that have anything to do with the story?” I can hear you already, “But Mary, that would be so uncomfortable.” Hmm. Yes. Have you ever heard the expression, “We must comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable?

If you are in a store and notice a person of color being followed, do one of two things—find a manger and ask them why you are witnessing what you are witnessing. If you are up for it, follow the follower—see what the security guard is up to, or maybe even strike up a conversation with the person being followed. When you do that you say, “you are not alone here,” and more importantly, you increase their safety. You didn’t know you were so powerful, right?

If you see a person of color being pulled over on the side of the road, pull your car over and be a witness. Just sit there. If a policeman comes to your window and asks you what you are doing, just say, “I’m going to take my horse down to old town road, and I’m gonna ride ‘til I can’t no more.” You are entitled to pull over to the side of the road. Additionally, you might be saving a life and someone’s career. When a white person steps into any altercation, their whiteness changes the air. It says, “privilege is here.”

If you belong to a country club with mostly or all white members, start a minority recruitment plan. If they don’t want diversity, and you “aren’t a racist,” quit the club. Yes, I said it –cause that’s what you do when you “aren’t a racist.”

If your employer wants to be diverse, but the candidate with excellent credentials said “axed” instead of “asked,” fight hard to get that candidate hired and other cultures, beyond just white culture, honored.

If you have a neighbor who is a person of color, be the welcome wagon that goes overboard on inclusion. They will sense what you are doing and appreciate it. For every one of you, there are ten other neighbors who will barely wave at them.

These are just a few things off the top of my head.  I understand your desire to stay in the place of “comfortable indifference,” where you care but don’t CARE. Being white is so safe and all, why rock the boat? People like you got Jesus murdered, and there will always be people like you.

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